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Dr. Meredith Griffin | The Flourishing Life™

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Life Balance

Oct 13 2020

Do These 3 Things When Your Life Feels Stuck

Being stuck in life can feel a lot like being imprisoned. You can see, just beyond your reach, the life you know you’re supposed to live yet you cannot seem to make positive strides toward achieving that life. We’ve all been there. You may be there right now. Take heart in knowing that you are not alone, and there are some simple things you can do to make sure that being stuck doesn’t become your indefinite way of life. 

Image by Ichigo121212 at Pixabay

Full transparency. I have been stuck more than once in my life. I’ve felt stuck professionally, in my marriage, multiple times in my business aspirations, and even in writing things like this article you’re reading now. Initially, I allowed being stuck to make me wonder if I was ever going to see the life I believe God-designed for me. In fact, I’d been stuck professionally for so long that I wondered if I’d even heard God’s calling correctly or was it just my own desire speaking to me. If you’ve been there then you know how this feels.

Did I give up? I didn’t, but there were several times when I wanted to quit. One thing that made the difference for me was the formula from three verses of Scripture that I’d read myriad times.

I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

Philippians 3:12-14

Sitting in a Roman jail, Paul’s experience of feeling imprisoned wasn’t figurative like ours. But even then he found a way to ensure that this wasn’t his permanent state of being. Here are the lessons we can learn from Paul.

Face the Truth About Where You Are

It’s hard to deny your locked up when you are literally in chains as Paul was in Rome. But sometimes we deny the reality of our current state, believing that it will help us out. It doesn’t. When I know where you are right now, you are able to plan where you are in relation to where you want to be. You are also able to figure out what actions are needed to move in the direction you desire. None of this can happen when you are denying the truth. 

If your marriage is in a bad state, telling yourself that everything is lovely doesn’t help at all. If you are 30 pounds overweight with high cholesterol, denying the numbers on the scale or the results of your bloodwork are the wrong things to do. Instead, you need to recognize where you are right now acknowledging that this isn’t where you want to be.

I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection.

Philippians 3:12a

Determine That This Isn’t Where You Will End

If you know where you are, and that it isn’t where God, or you, want to be, then it is easier to make a commitment that this is not the end. When I failed out of college following my freshman year (I was having way too much fun and doing too little work) I determined that my story wouldn’t end there. As I spent the next year working a job in retail, I rose daily realizing that there was a plan for me that included returning to school and completing my degree. Where I was wasn’t going to deter what I knew I was created for. 

Trust me. If it worked for Paul, and it worked for me, it can work for you too. Where you are now, no matter how far from your desired end, doesn’t have to be permanent. It is up to you to develop that mindset, and commit to that truth.

But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me.

Philippians 3:12b

Take a Single Action That Moves You Toward Your Goal

Sometimes when you are stuck, trying to get a whole plan for reengagement can seem daunting. So stop trying to get a whole plan. Instead, answer this question. What one thing can you do next that will move me closer to my goal. You don’t need to know or do everything, but just one thing. Think of it like a car stuck in a rut. All you need to do is rock the car loose of the rut and then you can begin moving forward again. All you need to do is take the one action that will get you moving positively toward your intended end, and then you can reengage or retool your plan from there. 

So where are you stuck in lifeIs it your marriage? Is it your health? Is it your profession? Is it your business? Don’t deny the you’re stuck. Face it. Then determine that being stuck isn’t going to be your permanent state. Finally, determine to do just one thing to get yourself moving in the right direction. Maybe its just declaring, like Paul, that the past is the past and you’re forgetting everything that hasn’t worked. I can attest, personally, that these steps have worked for me in every area I’ve discussed. They can work for you too.

No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

Philippians 3:13b-14

What’s holding you back from doing any of these three things? Are you willing to give these things a try if you’re stuck?

Written by Meredith Griffin · Categorized: Blog, Life, Marriage, Productivity · Tagged: Bible, Christian Living, Faith, Goals, Life, Life Balance, Life Coaching, Scripture, Unstuck

Mar 14 2016

Live One Life

images

“So to live one life, defined as ‘interweaving the various parts of life into a harmonious single narrative’, is going to take work.”

Where We Want to Be

I know what it is like to be pulled in many directions. I don’t like it. It doesn’t feel good. It makes me feel split, and pushes me to cry out for solace! The public me versus the private me. The professional me versus the recreational me. My emotional self versus my intellectual self. The combinations seem endless. What I want, what I believe we all want, is the peace that comes from having harmony among the different parts of our lives. Harmony. That’s the word that continues to call to me. I want harmony. Don’t we all?

Instead of harmony, most of us settle for organized chaos and call it harmony. After all, for many of us, it appears to be the best we can expect. Balancing health with our appetites. Balancing consumption with our desire for security financially. Being charitable, generous, and frugal, all at the same time. Being parent and spouse, and doing both well. Living as a faithful employee and a burgeoning entrepreneur. We manage. Sometimes we absolutely fall short of the goal. We work it out. But in the back of our minds, we’re always longing for better. We believe that somehow there is supposed to be more harmony in our lives. Well, there is supposed to be more. Harmony is possible. But we’ve got to be willing to do the work to achieve harmony, and sometimes the work towards harmony is difficult.

Live One Life

One of the definitions of harmony, according to Merriam-Webster’s online dictionary is, “an interweaving of different accounts into a single narrative.” How appropriate is that definition for where we desire our lives to be. I, we, want all the different parts (accounts) of my life to come together into a single narrative. I want to live one life, instead of all these separate lives that seem to have their own direction. Some would say that the varied, staccato parts of our lives do create a single narrative. After all, this logic would state, it is “our” life. True. Another definition of harmony, however, gives us a deeper understanding of what it means to live one life of harmony. A second definition of harmony is a “pleasing or congruent arrangement of parts.” So although my/your wild, harried, crazy life can be considered a single narrative, can it be considered (by you or others) either pleasing or congruent? If not, and if you desire to live one life, then it is time to commit to doing the work.

Commit to Do the Work

So to live one life, defined as “interweaving the various parts of life into a harmonious single narrative”, is going to take work. Harmony doesn’t just happen. Balance isn’t an accident. To live one life, we’ve got to decide to live for something other than the moment, while recognizing the importance of the moment in which we’re living. Living one life is greater than being a parent, employee, Christian, philanthropist, writer, spouse, or citizen, just like a puzzle is more than the individual parts in the box. Living one life is the sum of all those things when they come together in harmony. It will take work to see the picture. It is a composition that will take time to design. We must step back from the minutiae of all the different roles we play in life, in order to see the picture that all the roles create when they’re put in their proper place. Living one life is bigger than a mission statement, a vision board, or a slogan. It is the intentional, constant organizing and adjusting of our inner and outer, public and private, professional and personal selves. If we are willing to do the work, we can have the harmony that we desire in our lives.

Written by Meredith Griffin · Categorized: Life, Productivity, Rants · Tagged: Life, Life Balance, Life Lessons, Live One Life, Manifesto

Oct 14 2014

3 Vital Benefits Pastors Miss When They Are Isolated

Empty chears put in big circle on green lawn

While it is popularly believed that pastors are people persons, that isn’t always the truth. It is possible to make pastoral ministry, outside of Sunday morning, a solitary endeavor. It is possible for a pastor to become solitary by filling a week’s calendar with solitary events like study, reading, writing, and retreat. The truth is that the solitary pastor, and the church they lead, probably isn’t as effective as they could be at fulfilling the stated mission of the church. [Read more…] about 3 Vital Benefits Pastors Miss When They Are Isolated

Written by Meredith Griffin · Categorized: Leadership · Tagged: Charismatic Church, Great Commission, Leadership, Leadership Coaching, Leadership Development, Life, Life Balance, Ministry Coaching, Ministry Leadership, Pastoral Ministry, Prosperity Gospel, Relationships, Servant Leadership

Oct 07 2014

Stop Complaining and Make Life Count

MP900385246

Recently, I attended two funerals in the same day. I officiated one and simply attended the other. Funerals always leave a strong impact on those who attend, reminding us of our own mortality. To the casual observer the two funerals that I attended were at opposite ends of the spectrum, but the lessons they reinforced were invaluable. [Read more…] about Stop Complaining and Make Life Count

Written by Meredith Griffin · Categorized: Life, Rants · Tagged: Life, Life Balance, Productivity

Oct 02 2014

8 Lessons Church Planting Has Taught Me – Part II

Perfect Grade and Sticker on Homework

Church planting has been one of the most difficult and rewarding things that I have ever been blessed to do in my life. In the first post in this two-part series, I talked about the first four of the eight lessons that I have learned as a church planter. You can read the first post here. In this post I will cover lessons 5 through 8 that I have learned since planting Harvest Christian Fellowship in 2007. [Read more…] about 8 Lessons Church Planting Has Taught Me – Part II

Written by Meredith Griffin · Categorized: Church, Leadership, Life · Tagged: Church, Coaching, Harvest Christian Fellowship, Leadership, Leadership Coaching, Leadership Development, Life, Life Balance, Ministry Coaching, Ministry Leadership, Pastoral Ministry

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