We’ve all seen it, a motorist stranded on the side of the road or a car abandoned on the highway with a white cloth dangling from the windshield. Someone has been stranded. Their vehicle has malfunctioned and left them stranded somewhere between where they began and their ultimate destination. Inevitably we wonder what became of them, did they make it safely to help? Inevitably, we whisper a word of thanks that it was not us as we motor toward our destination. A similar scene plays out daily in the lives of pastors and leaders of ministries.
The statistics of those who find themselves burned out, broken, and empty from ministry service are well rehearsed, and some believe over-inflated. The numbers are reported, by some, to be well over 1,000 women and men every month who find themselves stranded, burned out, laid waste, and walking away from ministry service well before reaching their intended destination. Who knows what the real numbers are? I am unsure that the real number even matters. The truth is that pastoral ministry is a difficult, stressful, and in many ways draining vocation. Now this isn’t to say that there are not other vocations that are equally stressful and draining, but simply to acknowledge and affirm that ministry service can be taxing. The women and men who serve in ministry are called to, in my opinion, the ultimate helping profession. Most have come into ministry with noble aims and the desire to see their ministry assignments through to the end.
I am one such minister. I have been serving in ministry in some capacity, whether volunteer or full-time since 1992. In the years since, I have served in almost every role in the church, from the kitchen to senior pastor. In each one of the roles that I have held, I have desired to help people and advance the mission of Christ through the church. I have attended and graduated from two seminaries in an effort to be the best minister for God and his people possible. In all of that, the one thing that was not stressed enough was how to prevent being stranded as a ministry leader. No one stressed the importance of caring for myself so that I was always ministering to others, while keeping myself whole. As a result, I must admit that there have been seasons where I have ministered to others, while I was broken and hurting. I probably should have stopped to get myself together, but like so many I pressed on believing that I was honoring God.
Let’s be honest. Most of us get in our cars and just drive. Our vehicles are viewed simply as means of transportation. Their sole role is to get us from Point A to B. Most of us routinely do no more that put gas in the car when it is needed. Only at the sign of problems do we think of doing something more. The “check engine” light comes on. Smoke begins to pour from the exhaust. The car begins to stall. We hear strange noises. These signs begin to make us believe something may be wrong or need checking out. Some of us take the car in immediately for service when any of these signs appear. A significant number of us, however, continue to drive without a care in the world. We continue to do this at our peril, and the end is usually us stranded on the side of the road far from our intended destination. It was by God’s grace alone that I did not end up stranded.
Avoiding being stranded is easily avoidable, whether we are talking about cars or our lives in ministry. Every vehicle comes with an owner’s manual that details how to maintain the vehicle in order to optimize its useful life. It tells how often the tires should be rotated, what grade of gasoline to use, how often the oil should be changed, and the frequency with which other preventive maintenance should be performed. That’s the key…preventive maintenance. Our lives as ministers of the gospel, leaders in the Lord’s Church, are no different.
We too have been given an owner’s manual. It is the Bible; and if we would be careful to heed its suggested maintenance schedule for our own lives, we would increase the probability that our lives and ministries would reach God’s intended destination without problems. Here are just a few suggestions of things that have helped me along the way:
Be Devotional First
The biggest threat to ministry leaders is their propensity to become professionals. This has nothing to do with taking the call seriously and becoming good at what we do. The danger occurs when we begin to see ourselves only as Pastor X, Bishop Y, or Minister Z. We enter the danger zone when we become professional ministerial practitioners and cease being sons and daughters of God. This is dangerous because we then cease reading the Word of God as His children and begin approaching it simply as a tool of our profession. We stop reading the Bible to see and hear what our loving Father desires to say to us, and shift our reading to what God desires “us” to say to “them.” We must always approach God always as His children first. We must always allow God to speak to us through the Bible first. We must have our issues dealt with by our loving Father first. We must first be devotional.
Remember the Sabbath
The Sabbath was not instituted for God’s benefit, but for man’s. This is a basic principle that many in ministry leadership regularly teach others while violating themselves. The Sabbath reminds us that all that we have is not from the work of our own hands, but from God who loves and cares for us. Sabbath shows us that even when we cease toiling the work continues. Ministry leadership has a way, if we are not careful to remember the Sabbath, of tricking us into believing that the church cannot run without us. We believe that if we don’t preach every message, counsel every couple, and take every meeting, that the work of the Lord will fail. We must confront and repent of this prideful arrogance! We are blessed to be used by God in His mission, but God does not need us to accomplish His work. What does this mean? Take time off regularly. The good way to think of the principle of Sabbath is 1 in 7. We should have one day each week where we cease all ministry related activities. On that day we “cease striving and know that He is God.” We should also have regular times in our quarterly or annual calendar where we take extended “sabbaths” in an effort to refresh, revive, and reconnect with our families and God.
Know that Even the Lone Ranger Wasn’t Alone
The Lone Ranger had Tonto. We all need other people. Ministry leadership can be lonely. Especially for the pastors of smaller congregations who typically do not have other staff members that they can interact with daily. Ministry cannot be done well in isolation. Ours is a call to people and we should surround ourselves with people as often as possible. Get out of the office and around other people. I spend time in Starbucks just to be around others. We should develop a few relationships with others who we trust enough that we allow them to speak into our lives. They should be able to confront us when they see us moving off course. We should have trusted people who we meet with regularly to debrief and decompress. I think relationships for ministry leaders are so important that I wrote an article about them that you can read here. Isolation from others allows the enemy an opportunity to work on our weak points uncontested. In isolation even the smallest problem seems larger, and the sin that seems innocuous can destroy our lives and ministries. Don’t stay isolated.
God loves those who serve Him in ministry. He wants us to serve Him, while maintaining healthy marriages, relationships, and lifestyles. Take a moment to honestly ask yourself whether you are ministering from a place of health and wholeness, or are you on the brink of breaking down? If you’re honest answer is the latter, then pray and seek help from the Lord. Then seek out help from others. Let me know in the comments what other things you would suggest to ministry leaders who find themselves on the brink of being stranded. Let me know what you have done when you have found yourself in that place.